We're like a lot better than the average bears
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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