i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
