I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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