i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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