i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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