Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
