i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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