"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
This gyro tastes like lonliness
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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