I must be too annoying 4 u.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
