I wanna passion pit in your ass
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
This baby is an asshole
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
