You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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