we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I will be naked everywhere
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
