Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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