We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
