I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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