My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
