Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
