so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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