I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
