can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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