My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
