I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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