Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
