I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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