cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
