I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
tell me about the eggs
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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