He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
