Just fell off a train. Bad.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robitsâ€
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