I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
