Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize