Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Do vagina's smell?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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