Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I wish i was in the wii world.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
