i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
