Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
