dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
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