I smell stomach acid.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I want a musical about memes.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
