i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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