did you get engaged???
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
