i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Randomize
