it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
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