new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
