I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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