dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
