that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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