Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
