Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
