Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
