my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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