is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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