Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
