THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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